The Pussification Of America

No one wants to do jack shit anymore.  We are raising a bunch of whiney jerky cry babies.  In fact many of us are whiney jerky cry babies.

Remember the days of ole when someone acted like an asshole and they got their butt kicked? You can’t do that now, because you will go to jail and then get sued.  Asshats have all the power.

Remember when you had to go to school even when it was cold out?  Not anymore.  I live in Texas and we had one day of ice and for the next week the city periodically shut down because it was a little wintery out.  I mean, it is WINTER, and shockingly enough it is going to get cold out.  School boards were so scared of getting bitched out (or sued; it is, after all, the American way) by parents, they were calling bad weather days for cold.  Just.  For.  COLD!   I may have seen one teeny tiny icicle, but there were not even two flakes of snow, not even one.  How about we just cancel school for all of January and February?  God forbid little Suzie gets chilly on her way from the warm bus to the warm school.  When I was a kid I had to walk barefoot in the sand both ways and I even got a SUNBURN!  Ok, ok, I grew up in San Diego, but you get the picture.

Remember when you actually had to win to get a trophy?  Not anymore.  The fact that my kid gets a participation award for just being on a team pisses me off.  Honestly, that’s not the message I want to send to our youth, or particularly, my son.   Just show up, you don’t even have to try.  I want my kid to know he has to kickass and be awesome. Be a badass!  In the grown-up world, they aren’t going to get promotions and raises just for showing up (unless they work for the Government).  Our kids will be expected to do shit, shit that counts.  Or they can just live in your basement forever and you can continue to do shit for them…

Remember when America led the industrialized world and made everybody’s shit?  Not anymore.  Now China makes all of our shit.  Wonder why?  They do shit over there, they’re willing to do shit. People here don’t want the shit jobs anymore.  The blue collar jobs.   The jobs that may break your back, but make you stand tall.  Everyone wants a cushy job with a nice office.  No one wants dirt under their nails.  No one wants to plunge a toilet; we’re all too good for that.  Listen, I live w/ two men, I plunge a toilet at least once a week and I clean them too.  Why?  Because if I don’t do the shit, the shit won’t get done.  Shit will be everywhere…

Remember when hard work was something to be proud of?  Not anymore.  Now everybody thinks it’s their right to have a job they love.  Another myth we’ve spoon fed our youth.   It’s called work for a reason.  NOT everybody gets to love what they do.  If you manage to have a job you love, you are very, very lucky.  It’s not your God-given right.

Remember Reading, Writing and Arithmetic?  When using a calculator was cheating?  Not anymore.  Jeeze, in school they don’t even need to learn to write, like with their hands, anymore.  Why waste time learning when a computer, calculator or Government can think for them?

Speaking of the Government, it owes me.  People with more money owe ME.  Everybody OWES ME!  ME.  ME.  ME!  Nobody owes ME jack shit.  I owe myself.  Pride, dignity, respect.  Go work for what you want.  I hear kids graduating from college complain that it’s the previous generations fault they can’t get jobs, we’ve ruined it for them.  NEWS FLASH:  There have been recessions and depressions and economic slowdowns since the beginning of time.  They aren’t the first to endure this.  There are jobs out there and shit that needs doing.  If you don’t like the way things are, get out there, work hard, and change shit!  Start a revolution!  (Oh shit! That’s hard work!)  Complaining- won’t change shit.

I’m not going to tell anyone how to parent.  Ok so maybe I am, a little bit.  BUT I think we can all agree that if we focus on loving our kids, teaching them good core values (you know, right from wrong, The Golden Rule and such silly things), and set real boundaries with real consequences (so life’s consequences don’t include you bailing them out of jail at 3am someday) it would be a good thing for them and for us.  I think we are so busy not wanting to spank or yell or traumatize our children that we have forgotten consequences are part of real life.  Not teaching that to our kids is doing them a disservice.  If time out is what you like, great use it. But how about not saying something like this: “Jimmy if you do such and such again I’m giving you a time out.” Then Jimmy does again. “I’m serious; don’t make me count to 10! One, two, three.  I’m serious… One, two, three…  Don’t make me say it again…  One, two, three”.   And he does it again and again and again because he knows you never will reach Ten and there is no consequence.  The only consequence is he has to listen to you practice your numbers over and over.

Couples therapy, psychotherapy, counseling.  Depression, anorexia, anger management.  The lists go on and on.   Psychological and emotional trauma is a luxury for us 1st world inhabitants.  Hunger, rape, war, genocide.  These are the troubles facing people in Ethiopia, Yemen and the slums of Mexico.  When you’re agonizing over having to sell your 8-year-old daughter into marriage so your other children won’t starve, you don’t have time to take stock of the booboos your parents inflicted upon you and point fingers at everyone else for the problems in your own life.  No time for therapy when you are praying the guerrilla war doesn’t bust through your mud-hut door.  They don’t give a shit if their kid gets a participation award at school; they just want their children to survive.

Being born in America is winning the birth lottery and if we don’t start appreciating it and being grateful, like fall on your knees and kiss the ground grateful. Like willing to work hard and do SHIT to keep our country great, then I guess we will get to see how the other half lives. Then we will really have shit to complain about.

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287 comments

  1. The pussification of America is real, but to say searching for, acquiring skills, and carrying out jobs you’re passionate about and make you happy is a bad thing. Well that’s where we will have to disagree. Imagine if the majority carried themselves with a smile day in and day out because they never dreaded work because to them it isn’t. People would be far less stressed, and much more enjoyable. Not all the jack wagons waddling around with a sour puss face.

    Then again, this is coming from someone who decided to follow his passion at the age of ten, and would rather be broke and happy, than have money and be miserable 40 hours a week.

    1. She didn’t say it was a bad thing, but not everyone has the luxury to do what they love and make $ at it. There are parts to every job that you may not love, but you do it. Also, if you’re broke and need to eat you take a job doing whatever you can do to survive.

      1. Haha I responded to Landon’s comment first, then saw your response! YOU are exactly right, that is exactly what I meant/said. You can’t live off your parents, other people or the Government just because you don’t like the jobs available. That is only an option for those who legitimately can’t find work or are disabled etc…

      2. I have never had a job that didn’t have at least one aspect I didn’t like. Even our President has to worry about some leader sending troops into Ukraine as though he were Adolph Hitler seeking more lebensraum.

    2. I didn’t say having a job you love or following your bliss was a bad thing, I said, not everyone gets to be so lucky. In other words, if you can’t find a job you love, you still have to work… I’m very happy you have a job you love, so do I. BUT I have had jobs I didn’t love before. Thank you so much for reading!

      1. I think your point is that you can have a job you love, but you’re not entitled to it. In fact you probably have to work a whole bunch of shitty jobs and work your ass off to get to a point where you have a job you love. It’s not just going to be handed to you.

      2. Thank you!! That makes me so happy to hear! Posting my next blog today. I’m nervous though, its hard to follow up what I just did, even though I didn’t know what I was doing at the time…

    3. The article isn’t saying you shouldn’t have dreams or aspirations of finding a job that makes you happy but people should appreciate having a job that puts food in the table and be proud of that instead of focussing on how they don’t enjoy their job.

    4. however, who truly enjoys some of the jobs that needs doing? if you can’t find that job you love right away, do the job you hate while you figure it out, or while you are developing skills for the job that you want after you are done with the job that prevents other people from having to support your I have to find a job I love mentality. It’s work, not a hobby.

    5. Loved this rant! Here’s a little rant of my own: Being called a “pussy” should no longer be (mis)used as slang for women’s genitalia to mean someone/something is weak! As women, we KNOW after our brain, it is the greatest human source of strength, resillience and power!
      The saying should be “Pussy-Up!” ….think about how much “pounding” a pussy can take and the spectacular miracles they produce!

  2. Landon, if you don’t love what you do, gather the skills to do the job you’d love to do. Unfortunately sitting at home smoking weed, doesn’t require skills, and obviously there are a lot of folks that love to do that. Gathering skills requires effort aka work.
    I agree with everything the author says, even about everyone gets a trophy. The everyone gets a trophy theory creates people who were taught that effort is required to receive a reward. That transfers to their workplace attitude, we see it everyday, people show up for work and expect a big check just for that. They don’t want to excel at their job, they do just what they have to, to keep from getting fired. When they do get fired, they sue,
    Alcoholism, drug addiction is not a life long disability that the government should send you a check for every month, that makes them enablers. Alcoholism, drug addiction are personal choices, you can always choose not to participate in either one of them. I do believe it’s a sickness, but sickness can be cured.,
    That’s my rant…thanks

    1. Thanks Whiskers! Reading so many comments from so many people who read what they want and not what I wrote, just because they are looking (looking hard!) for a reason to get pissy, was interesting to say the least. BUT I have so many people like you, who get it. I wasn’t being mean or picking on the mentally ill or advocating violence. I was just bringing up some valid points, in a way that was fun (I hope) to read. Not everyone taking pills or Government handouts legitimately needs them. Some parents do let their kids get away w/ the worst behavior w/ no repercussions or discipline. If you genuinely do need help or are trying to be a responsible parent, this blog wasn’t about you and don’t get butt-hurt by it… Thanks again!

  3. I totally agree with this shit.

    This may sound fatalistic, the cup is half empty, we’re all gonna die, etc.. But the reality is that there are more of them (leachers, mediocre, show up to get paid, show up and feel they deserve an ‘A’) than there are of us with regards to this thought process.

    So my question is, HOW do we change the course of a ship that is as large as this? HOW do we instill the pride, work ethic, and ‘go get em’ attitude against the chill on the couch, just show up to work, you deserve whatever you want without the effort mindset?

    I think we all agree (with a couple exceptions) that this is an excellent preamble, but what is next?

    1. Yes you are correct. Unfortunately it far easier to see the problem than to fix it. How do you change a whole generational way of thinking? BIG question? All I can do is start at home by working hard myself and trying to raise a thoughtful, hardworking, contributing member of society. Beyond that… ???

  4. And this is exactly why being a teacher is so damn difficult in this country. It’s one thing to deal with the red tape part of teaching that the government throws at us, but honestly I just find it to be a mild annoyance. What makes teaching difficult is….how do you fight against an entire mentality? How do you teach kids who don’t want to study or do homework? Or at least they don’t want to have spend more than ten minutes on it. I actually had a kid this week say he wasn’t going to do his (already very late) homework because he has better things to do with his time.
    I can tell when a parent is at home, trying hard to fight against this mentality too. Those kids I can teach, I can help. And I can tell when a student has parents who are pussified. They are the ones whose futures I fear.

    I think about this every damn day. How do we fight an entire generation’s worldview? Is it too late to reteach them?

    1. Oh Kelly I do not envy you your job. One teacher friend of mine told me, she tries to be honest and fair, but when a student gets a low grade or punishment parents call to yell at her. They want the grade raised or punishment deferred. How can your child get better if they think they are already perfect? Then when school had to be made up on Saturday (back East) for a snow day missed, they called to yell at her. She doesn’t make that decision and she too is losing her Saturday. She spends more time dealing w/ over involved (IN THE WRONG WAY) parents, than doing her job. Be involved, study, practice w/ kids, but don’t prevent them from learning and growing as human beings by trying to make sure they never learn coping skills or that mistakes have consequences.

    2. I admire you just for trying to teach lazy kids. I was raised with a belt and a word people forgot..it’s call respect. When my teacher tells me something that my kid did wrong I never question the teacher, butt kid suffer the consequences..we need to reach kids responsibilities, we need to teach them at home.. I’m so glad I have decent kids but they still have to do chores, homework and treat people with decency..keep your good job as a teacher you might reach some of the good kids there

    1. Thanks! My next blog post Why Elected Officials Will Get You Bit By A Zombie is done. I just need a sober edit (heehee) or two. I may have it up tomorrow, Wednesday night at the latest…

      1. I don’t know why some people don’t get it. Being on the dole destroys your self esteem makes you a servant of the state.

        I was born and raised in Arkansas. We were dirt poor, and too stinking proud to take a welfare handout. I’ve been working since I was 12 years old, and still am. I don’t know what to do with myself if I’m not working! Every day I see some crap on my yahoo mail sidebar about some “Trick” to get free insurance, or health care, or whatever. I pay as much attention to that as I do to the neighbor’s cat.

        “Anything free is worth what you pay for it.” -RAH

        Charlie

  5. Ya know how you read what someone is up to on Facebook and than you see that person on the same day, for some what is talked about online does not get discussed in person…face to face. What worries me is that Meaningful posts like this will not see the light of day because we are in our comfortable home offices or living rooms blogging. Before the Internet, people also used to go out in public and stand up for what they believe in and many got their ass kicked or killed. It is way easier to bully someone online than it is to do it in person as you don’t have the knee jerk response from those who have had enough of your crap and sock you in the face. When you get punched in the face, you take a moment to think about what you said or did. Online we keep flapping our lips without consequence. We talk about our youth being soft….these days sad to say, we are not much different..

    1. Scuse me! If you’re in the right then why are you afraid of confrontation? Read the title of this post! If you don’t have the courage of your convictions then you are part of the precipitate, not the solution.

      Charlie

    2. First, I am not bullying anyone, since the meaning of that word is: To use superior strength or influence to intimidate (someone), typically to force him or her to do what one wants. But thanks for thinking I have superior influence. Second, I talk about this all the time with friends and people I know, in the light of day. I finally decided to write it down instead of always just “talking” about it. Consequently, it would be seen/heard by a broader audience. I am not afraid to write or say what I think.

      1. “Make no little plans they have no magic to stir man’s blood” -Architect

        I am on board with everything discussed here, it’s awesome.

        Oh, And by the bullying definition provided perhaps more should use superior strength or influence to force (someone) to do something.

        We cannot forget about the men and women driving buses and subways trains; all transportation. Those driving snow plows to clear our road ways so we can get to Starbucks. The farmers in midwest that do more before 6am then most do the whole day. And all the others who are doing their job for probably not enough pay, that don’t get distracted every thirty seconds when their phone buzzes. We never talk about these people. They are pretty important.

        By the way, I am addicted to my phone, worse than when I used to smoking cigarettes.

        I apologize for my non sequetor reply, I don’t have time to do a thorough reply cause someone just texted me, I gotta go.

      2. At first I thought you were a jerk, but now I think you are an okay guy (I am making an assumption that you are male). Possibly even kind of cool. Thanks for your response and I did not feel it was a non sequitur, seemed pretty coherent to me… Sorry that I misunderstood you.

  6. Thank you for having the balls to say it like it is. I’m honestly embarrassed to say I am an American most of the time. Men are being emasculated and expected to tuck their nuts between their legs, speaking the truth is not “politically correct” because you might hurt someones wittle feewings, and like you said, all of our shit is MADE IN CHINA. When I go shopping, I turn over every label to see where it’s made. If I can get a US made one for a few bucks more. No one is entitled to shit here, and it burns my ass to know that I have to pull the weight of others via taxes or whatever kind of extortion forced upon me. And Tim, as much as I’d like to flame your for your comment about “Who cares how shitty other countries are,” Karma will take care of that for me.

  7. There’s nothing I can add! You’ve said everything that I’ve been thinking for years. If our founding fathers thought like most people seem to today, there would never have been a United States. We have become a country full of candy-asses.

  8. I know what you mean, Example-I spent a month in Flordia, The rental car company screwed me, what do I do with 30 newspapers delivered while I was gone.I spent 4 days in the line at Walmart pharmacy waiting for my meds. Jeb Bush charged me 12% as a tourist charge on lodging. Next year I stay home & freeze!!

    1. Oh the nerve! Four days in line! I hope you brought your flask, vodka makes prescriptions work better. May I suggest you use the 30 newspapers to make a paper mache likeness of me?

  9. why yes! I agree — and yet, I am a therapist by original training and just got so sick of parents wanting me to fix their kids. Instead, I would say, “well what are you gonna do? big mamma”

    now, I got the “skills” I want – blogging, inventing, writing, and its f-king hard b/c not everyone likes my shit and I often make crap money, but I am trying and showing my kids hard work…and I don’t even get a trophy.

  10. We have to come back together and form one voice… the internet provides an excellent medium for this. However, putting anyone (or any type of person/group in society) down keeps us all down. Don’t blame the reflection. Look in the mirror and be the change you want to see. If you want the world to be a better/positive place, you can’t say negative things. Ever.

    I realize that’s not what gets you blog hits (or TV viewers), but that’s exactly what needs to change. I know you are only trying to help, and I think you are exactly right about what you are saying. However, by saying it, you are kind of adding to the problem… that’s why you can’t figure out how to solve it.

    Try writing a post without saying anything negative. It might not be as funny or popular… but is it worth it? –Think about it. 🙂

    That’s the answer to the BIG question. It is time to come together and say we’ve had enough negativity by proving it. We have to make the decision, as individuals, to stop supporting / excusing negative entities… even those within ourselves. It starts with us as individuals, but everyone is connected. Play your part. That’s all you have to do. It won’t work right away, but don’t give up hope. People are inherently good, they’ve just grown up in a world of excuses. Like you.

    It sounds like you have a good heart and a good mind. You are very blessed… but please don’t ever use a blessing to put other people down. Be thought-provoking… be yourself… but be nice or you are adding to the problem you are trying to solve. The choice is yours. It is time for the return of personal accountability/responsibility. It is time for people to do what is right… and stop questioning morality. It is wrong to be mean to people. It is especially wrong if you do it for fame or money.

    Sorry. I am not trying to be mean. I am passionate about this cause. I know I can’t change selfish people who don’t care about the world… but I can tell by your post that you do care. Please think about it, and do what you can to inspire others to think about it too.

    That’s how we make the world a better place. Take your own advice. No excuses. 🙂

    1. There is some truth in what you say, but when did it become OK to be a lifetime parasite? Oh, I remember. It was when the politicians decided that they could get a reliable voter base by putting virtually everyone on the dole!

      We have fifth generation welfare sucks out there, “work ethic” is not in their vocabulary, and they don’t know how to do jack shit anyway. They have created a pathological culture of entitlement, and it’s OK to wear stupid clothes, or be a misogynist, a misandrist, a thief or a murderer (or all of the above). Just as long as you get what you want.

      Really? Not in my world it isn’t!

      Charlie

      1. The same time it became okay to put other people down. Your world is their world. Stop looking for how you are different/better… and start seeing how you are the same. Work together to make the world a better place. The poor/impoverished blame haughty, high and mighty people who think they are better. You are both right. But you are both wrong for blaming anyone other than yourself. Figure it out. 🙂

    2. “Emily” To be honest w/ you I do not want to write a social change blog. I enjoy writing interesting rants far better than nicey nicey morality lessons. I would like to make people think, but do so in an entertaining and proactive way. I take complete responsibility for what I have written and I like the way I did it. Getting your feelings hurt is silly, just like getting your feelings hurt over a comedian’s skit is silly. You seem like a very nice person too, but you are taking this a bit too seriously. This post isn’t going to change or ruin anyone’s life; at best it will get some conversations started. I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment. BTW I am not getting money or fame from blogging, although I see nothing wrong w/ it if I did! I do it simply because I enjoy it.

      1. Thanks for responding. I am not taking YOUR post seriously or getting hurt by it.
        I’m just pointing out the irony… which is something I think only comedians can handle/understand because they are willing to laugh at themselves. In fact, I think comedians are the only ones who are smart enough to figure it out these days.

        Trust me… I am not offended. I’m the funniest chick you’ll ever meet… but you have to meet me and talk in person. I’m mean as shit and making fun of stupid people is my favorite past-time… I just don’t do it on a public forum anymore.

        That’s the problem with America. We talk at each other, not with each other.

        You aren’t saying anything new or interesting… that’s why everyone agrees with you. What you are saying is obvious. I am asking you to actually say something new and interesting… something that isn’t obvious. Be funny. That’s awesome. I f*cking love funny chicks… I’m just tired of the hate/blame in society.

        Do whatever you think is right, baby doll. Just don’t make excuses for bad behavior or you are no better than them.

      2. “Emily” you seem to be all over the board here. Anyway, I don’t think my behavior is bad and I am certainly not making excuses for it. If I am not writing anything interesting, why are so many people reading it and saying it is in fact interesting? No, it is not a new idea, but I wrote it in a fresh and entertaining way. Instead of telling me how to write, go write your own blog. You have every right to to it better. Thanks for your comment!

    3. quote: “It is time for the return of personal accountability/responsibility.”
      This part of your comment, I agree with but you’ll never make it happen by being nice and coddling people.
      allieheeney is right on! Humor or not, keep it up! People are not going to change unless it’s pounded into their heads enough times.

      1. Do you think I am being nice and coddling Allie? Do you think I am being nice and coddling you? I see a problem in the world and I am trying to fix it. I am being honest, kind, and unyielding. I am not forcing my opinion on anyone. I am asking people to think for themselves and do what they know is right, and stop making excuses. We need a paradigm shift in society. It starts with each and every one of us. That isn’t the same as coddling… but I am being nice. 🙂

      2. Coddling was not my word “Emily”, but I do think you are being very passive-aggressive. I appreciate your points and opinions, but this blog post is my opinion and I stand behind it. Thanks again for commenting.

      3. Allie, we are on the same team… why are you fighting ME? I am saying you have an amazing heart, mind and voice. I’m just asking you to ask yourself if you are part of the problem or part of the solution.

        What you are saying is 100% right, but I am challenging you to say it in a new way. I want to change America. You want to change America. I am using love/kindness. You are using hate/blame. Think about it… what do you think the problem with America is?
        Too much of people like you, or too much of people like me?
        One of us should change. I agree. We just disagree on who it is.

        —End of conversation?? I don’t think so. That’s congress. That’s America. That’s the problem. That’s why there is gridlock. That’s why America is broken. Divided we fall.

        I’ll stop now, unless you think there is any truth to what I am saying.
        I never meant to upset you. Good luck and thanks for helping in your own way. 🙂

      4. I am certainly not fighting you. You keep trying to convince me that I’m being mean or I have bad behavior and I disagree. I think I say things in a funny, raw and real way. I don’t want to change, nor do I think I should. I also don’t think you should change, you should be 100% who you are.

  11. I agree with most of your statement but counceling and depression ect… I’ve been and have known many people who have deployed that depend on counceling upon returning does going to combat and needing counceling make you part of that class (pussification of America). If to call me a pussy then

    1. Dan, first and foremost thank you from the bottom of my heart for your service to this country. That isn’t what I meant (or said). All I was pointing out was that people in 3rd world countries have all of those problems, plus worse (child slavery, genocide!) and they don’t have access to medical care or medicine, so they are in a more dismal situation. Basically I was trying to illuminate how lucky we are in this country. Thank you for reading!

  12. Great article! Sadly I agree with everything you said AND I attribute MOST of the problem to Women’s Liberation of the 60’s, 70’s & 80’s…and up to the present. I’m not saying women shouldn’t vote, or shouldn’t speak their mind, or shouldn’t be able to express their opinions freely…HOWEVER…we should expect that this would be the outcome when given 100% freedom and do/think whatever their hearts desire. They’re gonna spoil their kids, they’re gonna make decisions based on emotion, they’re gonna show compassion towards criminals. Unfortunately, it will only get worse from here. I only have another 30 or 35 years and I’m out, so I really don’t care what happens after that (no kids). Just kind of sad to see.

    1. I do appreciate your comment, but have to disagree. This is a problem created by both genders and more a result of the 70’s peace, love, and don’t spank your kids! Then add the excess of the late 80’s and 90’s when we started over spending on Christmas and everything else. Then the 90’s when you were suddenly a child abuser if you were even stern w/ your children. It’s a multifaceted problem and I am just making some quick hypotheses here. I am a strong woman. I own my own business and work from home now, but I spent 7 years in corporate America. Now I can’t deny that having less parents at home w/ children (more childcare providers raising our kids) has caused problems, but that is a big topic to tackle and I don’t blame mom’s working outside the home at all.

  13. Writing a blog without saying something reality based (negative), that’s called Facebook. It’s where many of the pussified live their imaginary lives. Negative is fine as long as you also provide a positive solution to the problem.

    1. It was very much based in “reality” and I did give solutions. Hard work and discipline! I am not going to give anyone a step by step guide, nor do I think I have the authority to do so. AND if I did do that then you would be going on about “what gives you the right to tell people what to do”. I was just pointing some things out in a way that I hope was interesting and provocative.

  14. You could not be speaking more truth. I am raising two kids; one with autism and I am absolutely crazed by the fact that nothing is earned. My son has challenges, we all do but he has to understand that the world is not handed to you. And even if it was, why would you want something that came so easy. Great, great message here! Loved it.

    1. Brain first let me say I am sorry your son has challenges in his life, but thankfully he has a great parent to help him become all he is capable of, and all he deserves to be. Second, thank you for not reading into what I was saying and thinking I was in anyway discounting the the troubles and hardships your son certainly faces. It seems some people read what they want and not what I wrote. I appreciate your comment so much!

  15. Love your kick-ass attitude and writing style! I was on board with it all except for the “Psychological and emotional trauma is a luxury for…” I understand the bigger point you were making, but depression, anorexia, OCD, bi-polar disorder, etc… can be just as devastating, catastrophic and deadly as the other 3rd world problems you mentioned. They are just not visually as frightening and almost invisible if you, a friend or a family member is not the one dealing with them. I love creative writing and reading crazy ass rants, but mental illness and luxury are three words I don’t ever appreciate reading in the same sentence. Oh – and government workers – I wish they all didn’t get such a bad rap. My husband is a scientist at NASA. He has more schooling, is smarter and works harder than so many douchebags I know in the private sector and he will never, ever make anywhere close to the amount of money many other professionals make. There are thousands and thousands of civil servants that bust their asses, get no bonuses (why does everyone think bonuses are passed around like candy??) and get the luxury of leaving a whopping 59 minutes early every once in a while – like on New Years Eve or Christmas Eve! Ok – rant over. That was fun – quite cathartic. I should do it more often. : )

    1. Thanks for your kick-ass response! Yes, you have valid points. I was not discounting mental illness at all, I really was just making a point. Third world countries have all the same mental illness issues we have PLUS they have child slavery, genocide etc. AND they do not have the luxury of medical care or prescriptions that might help them like we do. Anyway it is fun right? Maybe you should write a blog too! Thanks again!!

  16. Allie and Emily, I don’t think either one of you are part of the problem unless you think that the rest of the world owes you a living while you go out and party it up.
    I do think that Emily is reading the original post wrong. I don’t see any “hate” there. Just a statement of the facts. As far as being nice to everyone, I suggest you take a stroll through a few of our “not so nice” neighborhoods and see how long you feel like treating everyone nicely.
    I’m not the best at explaining things but I’ve lived on both sides of the track and find that the more you have, the less you feel that you have to actually work for it. And the less you have, the more you think everyone else should help you out.
    Everyone just needs to get back to feeling pride in what they do. If everyone takes pride in their accomplishments, the rest would take care of itself.

  17. I agree with everything you said except the blue collar jobs part. I think if corporations kept their manufacturing plants in the US and didn’t outsource them to countries where the labor is so cheap then Americans would definitely take those jobs and also be proud to do them. The corporations didn’t outsource their factories because they couldn’t find workers to do it, they outsourced to cut their costs and raise their share prices. It’s a real problem in our country and bringing those blue collar jobs back is a great way to toughen us up both figuratively and literally.

    1. You are right. The thing is when writing a blog you can’t expound on every detail, if you go on too long you lose people. So I was using generalities to make a grand point and get in and get out. My husband is a blue collar worker and I am proud of him and his 3 jobs. Thanks so much for reading!

  18. “Hunger, rape, war, genocide. These are the troubles facing people in Ethiopia, Yemen and the slums of Mexico.”

    Ah, the same old familiar stereotypes of how bad it is in the “third world.” You’ve actually visited, slums in say, Nigeria, right? And compared it to say, the back country in Appalachia, right? Take away the people and the Confederate flags, you wouldn’t know what country you were in. Our poverty, our violence, our child hunger rates are just as bad as anywhere in the world.

    In any case, you fall victim to the very thing you speak out against in your article. Railing against all the things that aren’t right, yet offer no real framework for solving the problem.

    1. Actually my bother has done missionary work throughout Africa so that is a second person account, my husband spent time in Thailand and I have been in the slums of Mexico. No one has been to Yemen, but I do read… Sadly enough, we do have underground child sex rings as that filthy disgusting crime is everywhere, but 8 year old child brides are not legally married to 50 year old men (w/ marital consummation), it is not normal or completely acceptable as it is in places like Yemen. We do not have the child sex slave infestation like in Thailand for example or human trafficking in the quantity of Uzbekistan. Hunger is a problem absolutely, but not on the catastrophic level as in many African nations (and other countries). We do not deal w/ genocide here. If you really think it is as bad here as it is in those places, then it is obviously you who have not traveled the world. And you are proving my point that Americans do not appreciate their advantages. To try and compare something that is not even the same is discounting the horror those people live through. I AM NOT saying horrid things don’t happen here, but not to the same degree, not on the same scale. We have laws and Government programs which do protect and help MOST people… AGAIN I am not discounting any of the horrors that do happen here (it breaks my heart), as they do anywhere that humans are, but we do a lot more to try and protect and help our people and we should be grateful for that.

    1. Thank you, it makes my heart happy to hear other bloggers say they enjoy reading my words! Responsibility absolutely happens at home w/ small things like chores, which will transfer over (hopefully) to a good work ethic as adults…

  19. Love, love, love this post! You’ve said everything I’ve been saying for years…only in a much cooler way! I have two kids and thankfully we’re finally getting out of the “everyone gets a trophy for showing up” phase!

    My biggest problem with that is that it is NOT reality. As you said-We are doing nothing to prepare kids for life when they learn that they get all sorts of praise for “minimum necessary effort.” The flip side of that is that the kids NEVER learn to deal with failure. They do need to learn to work hard, do their absolute best, and make optimum use of their God-given talents. They also need to learn that there are times when you can bust your ass, practice like crazy, study your heart out and you still might fail. Your team might have worked hard all season-and you still lost the game in overtime at the buzzer. You stayed home every night and studied your butt off for that Math test-and you barely eeked out a C. You’re qualified, smart, capable, with an awesome résumé, and you aced the interview-but someone else got the job.

    Shit like this happens all the time in the real world. Too many kids are so sheltered by well-meaning parents that their first experience with failure doesn’t happen until they’ve left the best. And then they’re completely crushed and flabbergasted! I totally agree with everything you’ve said here.

    We need to “un-pussify” our kids and teach them the value of hard work and doing the absolute best they can. They also need to have the experience of doing all that…and having shit go wrong anyway. And learning that when it happens-you suck it up, put your big girl panties on, and give it a go again tomorrow.

    Wow…I rather enjoyed that little rant too! This IS cathartic! Love your blog! 🙂

    1. Thank you for TOTALLY getting it and not reading a bunch of nonsense into it, just so you could get butt-hurt! YOU ROCK! Thanks for reading and commenting. BTW it is rather fun, isn’t it??!!

  20. The author is spot on. I have been complaining about participation trophies AND at lower levels “the snack” which parents were on a rotation to bring for after the game. Our kids cant play an hour game without having a snack after??? In our day in Rec league or CYO you had the ability to get “CUT”! Not only did everyone not get a trophy NOT EVERYONE even made the team! Could you imagine in this day and age if a coach told a parent that their future NFL QB was not good enough to play on the team and needed to work on their skills first?? Wholly hell people would be busting a gasket! I have had the opportunity to coach my two boys for the past six years in a bunch of different sports, and I’m sorry if you are in the 4th grade, a boy, and cannot dribble a basketball with one hand, stay the hell home and do not come out for the basketball team. It is not the coaches responsibility to teach a 10 year old how to play basketball, thats Mom and Dads job!!! Unfortunately this everyone makes the team attitude does not project into real life. We wonder why so many 23 year old adults are depressed because they can’t get a job? Its probably the first time in their life that someone said NO to them!! Hey you suck, but I think I can find a spot for you in our company, No one ever said in a job interview!!

    1. Right on!! I complain about the dumb snack too. Really? Why am I expected to feed everyone’s kid? Its always sugary crap and they bitch if it’s not provided. Also, all the parents pitching in for a coach gift end of season burns my backside. We don’t play rec anymore, we have moved up to select, but my husband wouldn’t accept gifts… My husband talks about when he was kid playing sports in inner city Philly and how you had to try out for all the teams. Also they played baseball on a field of gravel!

      1. Allie, This might be a good subject for one of your articles. Some of the problems in our schools!

        Snacks, trophies and the way sports have taken over our schools. You would be surprised by the way the kids who are not in sports get treated compared to those who are.

        And snacks! My five year old grandson is expected to bring a snack every day, then once a month snacks for the whole class. After a couple of weeks at school this year, he asked his mom if he could take two snacks everyday. She told him that one was enough and he got a little upset so she pressed a little as to why he thought that he needed two treats every day.

        He finally told her that the second treat was for a little girl in his class. She never brought a snack and the other kids were teasing her about it.

        There are a lot of families who can not afford all of the treats, sports, etc. in schools today and it’s usually the kids who suffer for it.

  21. Hey Allie, YOu sexist. Call it the “Dickification of America” where whoever the hell it is is turning our kids into dicks, not pussies. After all, it’s dick-headed ideas and philosophies that got us into this mess, not “pussy” ideas. It wasn’t women who created the dumbing down of our kids.

    1. I wouldn’t mind calling it the Dickification at all. Sorry if it offended you. The thing is I’m not easily offended and the word made me giggle, whilst also perfectly defining what I was trying to say. I am far from sexist. I am strong willed women who says exactly what I think.

  22. Look I’m not saying you have to be LeBron James or Bryce Harper but at least know how to dribble and/or hold a baseball bat so you don’t look like a total douche canoe when you step up to the plate for the first company softball game you play in!! Just have some realistic expectations for your kids when it comes to sports and life! If you are 5’6 140 and your wife is 5’2″ 190 your offspring are probably not going to start at QB for The Ohio State Buckeyes! Especially if they have been sitting on their ass their entire adolescent life playing X-Box! And hey, if you want little Johnny and Sally to get a trophy have a snack and swing at 35 pitches before the dribble one back to the “coach” pitcher and ,start heading to third instead of first so be it, but do not tell me I have to take them on my team and bring down the kids that want to play by the rules, learn the games and compete! I hear you on the gravel fields we did the same thing in NY. Whiffle ball in the alley, pick up sandlot baseball, touch football in the street, and it wasnt mommy and daddy driving us to the local park it was the kids in the neighborhood organizing everything, and believe you me there was a pecking order that Mommy and Daddy had NO control over and really did not give a crap about! You earned your stripes in the neighborhood and carried that through your life! Your blog hit a nerve with me! I have been dealing with this crap in helicopter mom filled suburbatory for years!

    1. I agree with you. Everyday after chores…..oops I said that word….hope I didn’t offend anyone, we all went and played baseball or football….sandlot style. Sometimes we had 9 players on a team, sometimes we had three. Never had a snack, we had breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I hate seeing where America is heading.

    2. Ok either you have been reading back at some of my comment replies or we were separated at birth. I use and love the descriptive word douchecanoe!

  23. The problem is that everyone has a sense of entitlement. An ideology that has been fundamentally inscribed into the american culture since its initial westward expansion of pillaging, rape, displacement and devastation to other sovereign nations.This shameless act of disrespect towards others has given way to the current state in which our citizens can excuse their shameless actions, like laziness, just like the forefathers did. The blame game that the current generation plays, in not excusable, but then again the blame game the older generation plays also is not excusable either. Who let the government to pass NAFT, allowed China to enter FTO and lost control and power to regulate the government. Sure doesnt seem like the current generation. Change wont come until we make it happen, this whole blog is a rant “complaint” as well as my comment , but then again “MURICA!!!

      1. If anyone could take this article as being an insult, they are in fact, the people whom you’re referring to. You did a smack up job of exposing what “our” problems are! I’m still slow clapping!

      2. Ok now this I understand and accept! I agree, some peoples comments are just proving my point and I’m left saying “Can I go now, or are you not done pointlessly bitching.”

  24. FINALLY someone says it OUT LOUD. our Kids are P****S. Stop Crying and grow up. Seriously.
    Best article EVER.

  25. Agree with ALL you wrote. But couldn’t we use a different word other than “pussification?” That word, referring to women’s parts, implies weakness, inferiority, when we are so strong! Hope to see that reference fades over time. It’s unjust and implies a “less than” value for all women. Everything else you written, however, is spot on. I think we all need to the words we use – words are more powerful than we think.

    1. The words “everything else you wrote” and “I think we need to think of he words we use” was incorrect in my last post…I hate auto correct!!! Hope the sentiment wasn’t lost as a result!

      1. Ok, so here’s what; you sound like a cool chick so I am sorry it offended you. BUT I like the word. It makes me giggle and it perfectly elucidated what I was trying to say. It also does not make me think of a vagina when I say it, and I don’t think vaginas are weak at all. Mine had a 9 ½ lb baby come out of it and I am a little tiny thing. I am just not easily offended and words don’t bother me, I guess intent does if anything… I like funny words. I also like dickhole, asshat, douchecanoe, just to name a few… Actually the word vagina kind of makes me giggle too, but so does penis. And I like to say it PEE-nis. BTW I totally got what you meant, but I always feel the need to explain my auto-correct mistakes too, even though I know people get it!

  26. I agree with this. But maybe you could’ve used a few less “shits.” They make you sound like the reason you can’t find a cushy office job is because you don’t have a higher education as opposed to the economy being tough.

    1. Thanks for your opinion, but I used the word shit on purpose. I was using it for effect, to get people emotionally stimulated. Furthermore, I have a great job that I love, but I have had jobs in my life I didn’t like… I wasn’t talking about the economy or lack of available jobs. What I was saying was that sometimes in life you may have to work jobs that you don’t like in order to get by . It’s shouldn’t be an option to sit on your couch and complain rather than take a job you think is beneath you.

  27. – “No one wants to do jack shit anymore. We are raising a bunch of whiny jerky cry babies. In fact many of us are whiny jerky cry babies.”

    Two of the biggest problems with a lot of modern day parents in America are that far too many of them strive to be their child’s best friend and that many of these pop-culture loving parents are blind to what being a good parent is all about, as they have deluded themselves with what they read in a magazine or viewed on a television program.

    – “Remember the days of ole when someone acted like an asshole and they got their butt kicked? You can’t do that now, because you will go to jail and then get sued. Asshats have all the power.”

    Remember the days when little kids/teenagers did not shoot up their schools, or when kids would actually settle a fight 1 vs. 1 on the playground? Yeah, I thought so. The ass-hats = criminals, elitists, followers, intolerant people, and those who fuel the military-industrial complex (i.e. the person you voted for).

    – “Remember when you actually had to win to get a trophy? Not anymore. The fact that my kid gets a participation award for just being on a team pisses me off. Honestly, that’s not the message I want to send to our youth, or particularly, my son. Just show up, you don’t even have to try. I want my kid to know he has to kickass and be awesome. Be a badass! In the grown-up world, they aren’t going to get promotions and raises just for showing up (unless they work for the Government). Our kids will be expected to do shit, shit that counts. Or they can just live in your basement forever and you can continue to do shit for them…”

    While I am not a big fan of all kids receiving a trophy I do believe that it is a non-discriminatory way of engaging children and trying to get them involved, while providing an example (albeit a flawed model) of how involvement (i.e. showing up) is the first step towards productivity.

    However, I see exactly what you are getting at and I agree with you.

    – “Remember when America led the industrialized world and made everybody’s shit? Not anymore. Now China makes all of our shit. Wonder why? They do shit over there, they’re willing to do shit. People here don’t want the shit jobs anymore. The blue collar jobs. The jobs that may break your back, but make you stand tall. Everyone wants a cushy job with a nice office. No one wants dirt under their nails. No one wants to plunge a toilet; we’re all too good for that.”

    It is called outsourcing. You do understand the concept of a globalized world and the impacts that it has (and continues to have) on a country that prides itself on capitalism, correct? The human element (the seven billion + and counting) is becoming more obsolete each & every decade.

    – “Remember when hard work was something to be proud of? Not anymore. Now everybody thinks it’s their right to have a job they love. Another myth we’ve spoon fed our youth. It’s called work for a reason. NOT everybody gets to love what they do. If you manage to have a job you love, you are very, very lucky. It’s not your God-given right.”

    People have more opportunities in this day and age. People know it is their right to have a better life. But yes, I can see and understand your point. Well, aside from your God-given religious stuff.

    – “Remember Reading, Writing and Arithmetic? When using a calculator was cheating? Not anymore. Jeeze, in school they don’t even need to learn to write, like with their hands, anymore. Why waste time learning when a computer, calculator or Government can think for them?”

    I agree. However, America needs to give up on believing that it can (and ever will) keep pace with the rest of the world in regards to academic rankings. While it is often nice & convenient to have tools that can help aid you in solving problems, it is (as you pointed out) much more important that a person be capable of doing so without the aid of tools/systems that can/do betray/fail them.

    – “Speaking of the Government, it owes me. People with more money owe ME. Everybody OWES ME! ME. ME. ME! Nobody owes ME jack shit. I owe myself. Pride, dignity, respect. Go work for what you want. I hear kids graduating from college complain that it’s the previous generations fault they can’t get jobs, we’ve ruined it for them. NEWS FLASH: There have been recessions and depressions and economic slowdowns since the beginning of time. They aren’t the first to endure this. There are jobs out there and shit that needs doing. If you don’t like the way things are, get out there, work hard, and change shit! Start a revolution! (Oh shit! That’s hard work!) Complaining- won’t change shit.”

    Yes, the government does not owe you but it most certainly owns you. I agree, be the change that you wish to see in society. Revolution? Please. The American citizenry is so programmed & conditioned that it believes revolution to be shit like Occupy. Hell, just look at how all of the sheeple reacted to Snowden. What did he even prove? That spying exists and how even the institutions within the superstructure have their own agendas? Pathetic. That is all historical fact. Then again, Americans (& most humans) seem to be great fans of revisionist history & the myriad of lies/propaganda that both governments/religious institutions promote in their efforts to maintain control/dominance.

    – “I’m not going to tell anyone how to parent. Ok so maybe I am, a little bit. BUT I think we can all agree that if we focus on loving our kids, teaching them good core values (you know, right from wrong, The Golden Rule and such silly things), and set real boundaries with real consequences (so life’s consequences don’t include you bailing them out of jail at 3am someday) it would be a good thing for them and for us. I think we are so busy not wanting to spank or yell or traumatize our children that we have forgotten consequences are part of real life. Not teaching that to our kids is doing them a disservice. If time out is what you like, great use it. But how about not saying something like this: “Jimmy if you do such and such again I’m giving you a time out.” Then Jimmy does again. “I’m serious; don’t make me count to 10! One, two, three. I’m serious… One, two, three… Don’t make me say it again… One, two, three”. And he does it again and again and again because he knows you never will reach Ten and there is no consequence. The only consequence is he has to listen to you practice your numbers over and over.”

    Totally agree. Preach on. Yes, children should be raised via honor and honesty, and not through favoritism and fear (like what Our government does with its children i.e. citizens).

    – “Couples therapy, psychotherapy, counseling. Depression, anorexia, anger management. The lists go on and on. Psychological and emotional trauma is a luxury for us 1st world inhabitants. Hunger, rape, war, genocide. These are the troubles facing people in Ethiopia, Yemen and the slums of Mexico. When you’re agonizing over having to sell your 8-year-old daughter into marriage so your other children won’t starve, you don’t have time to take stock of the booboos your parents inflicted upon you and point fingers at everyone else for the problems in your own life. No time for therapy when you are praying the guerrilla war doesn’t bust through your mud-hut door. They don’t give a shit if their kid gets a participation award at school; they just want their children to survive.”

    I can agree to disagree. You talk as if every American is wealthy enough to partake in therapy and counseling. Sure, a lot of it is bullshit that is fueled by talk shows and/or the pill popping pharmaceutical phenomena. However, We know more about the human brain/mind then at any point in human history. Psychology and therapy (i.e. learning to identify key factors & warning flags that may lead to abnormal behavior like kids shooting up schools or people seeking to prey on others) can/do/will benefit the masses.

    It is good that you brought up the Third World nations (even if you are incapable of touching on the Second World Nations i.e. look it up and read) yet everything there (and here) is all part of the same vicious cycle promoted by the powers to be.

    Ghettos, slums, hunger, disease, despair, rape, violence, etc. exist in nearly all corners of the world. All parents (i.e. the one who actually warrant being labelled as such) care solely for the survival of their children.

    Yes, a large % of people living in Third World and Second World nations have to worry about armed political/religious extremists & militants due to large power vacuums that are created by First World nations. You know, when Our country (Republican and Democrat alike) either turn a blind eye to human rights violations/wholesale slaughter, or get involved solely because the nation where such heinous acts take place can offer strategical (i.e. military), political, and/or economical advantages.

    – “Being born in America is winning the birth lottery and if we don’t start appreciating it and being grateful, like fall on your knees and kiss the ground grateful. Like willing to work hard and do SHIT to keep our country great, then I guess we will get to see how the other half lives. Then we will really have shit to complain about.”

    America definitely has a lot going for it. Access to clean drinking water. The breadbasket of the world. Freedoms (even if they are eroding). Liberty (declining). However, nationalism is, was, and always will be one of the biggest traps in the history of human civilization. While it definitely holds a lot of promise in the hands/minds of responsible people, it is far too often used to promote fanatical behavior that leads entire nations and generations to ruin.

    1. I’m not really sure what the point was of copying and pasting my whole article back to me? I wrote it, so obviously I know what I said. It seems to me since you have so many ideas you should write your own blog, but you would need to get rid of the condescending tone and funny it up a bit or no one will want o read it. I’m going to respond w/o pasting everything you wrote.

      Your first point seems to be saying basically what I was saying, in a slightly different way.

      Your second point basically blamed the criminals, the rich, followers (?? who are these people), bigots and the military. I think actually the problem would be the parents. If you raise you child right, what is happening outside the home is going to have minimal influence in comparison to what you are doing…

      Since you apparently read my article you know I disagree. A participation award, while it does reward the kids who just “showed up’ and maybe encourages them to just “show up” again, diminishes the work of those who spend hours practicing to be better and still get no other merit that the ones who just “show up”. Plus when they grow up and have to work, their boss will not give them a raise for “showing up” they will be expected to put in hard work and excel. So we are setting them up for failure.

      You do understand the definition of pompous, correct? I didn’t have time to dissect every point of China and the massive shift in goods production from here to there. Clearly I was making a point.

      Yes, people in America have many opportunities, thank you for elucidating my point. So much so that if they don’t find the job they want they don’t want to go work at Burger King for awhile to pay their bills, even if the choice is that or unemployment… If you get a degree in Fine Arts, guess what you may have a problem finding a job, go bartend if you have to…

      I am going to skip down a few now since I actually agree w/ your next few opinions, but again people will enjoy reading what you have to say more if you don’t talk down to them. You are obviously smart and quit obviously trying to show everyone.

      I know what 2nd world countries are and I do read, but in a blog you can’t go on and on and on (although you do it quit well) or you will bore people and they won’t bother to finish. I was trying to make a few extravagant points while still entertaining people, so they would want to continue past the first paragraph. I wasn’t trying to torture them w/ a sociology lesson.

      Lastly, I completely disagree. Too many people want to complain about this great country and do nothing to help. Don’t ask me what I am doing because I am working hard and trying to raise a responsible human being, if everyone did just that we would be better off. Again, the whole point of my article is each of us should take personal responsibility and not look to the Government, the person next to us, etc etc for assistance or to lay blame. ANYTHING is a bad thing if not in the hands of responsible people… Duh

      1. If my pointing out the inadequacies of your article warrants me as being this “condescending & pompous” individual then I will take that as a compliment.

        Perhaps you are suffering from your own “Pussification of America” syndrome. 😛 Did that not funny it up, or is my bland sense of humor and sarcasm undervalued like my honest & totally unfiltered reply to your relevant post?

        My point was to attack the pop-culture (you know, the pathetic and sad reality of modern day American core values: strive to be popular, strive to be rich, strive to be a follower) effect(s) that plague the young minds and “mature” minds of this nation.

        I meant followers as in those persons who are unable and/or unwilling to think for themselves.

        The military-industrial complex as in the funneling of corporate, military, & political value$ that dominate this country and the fate of the world. The same system that your child, and millions upon millions of other children will live under.

        Sorry, even if you raise your child properly they are still going to have to weather the storm of the fucked up reality that awaits them when they step outside you home. History is proof that a parent can only do so much for their child(ren).

        Yes, if you remove from society all of those elements that I mentioned then what do you have? Oh yes, an actual CIVILization.

        My point was to simply make clear that showing up is the first step & how it is a building block toward giving a damn. If a person shows up to work and cares about their work then chances are they will be keeping their job for the foreseeable future.*

        *Yes, this will clearly not prevent them from losing their job in regards to a place of business going out of business, a place of business needing to lay off workers, outsourcing of jobs, or the unfair/unjust working environments (i.e discrimination, favoritism, sexual harassment, etc).

        I am not seeking to nor trying to toot my own horn (or as you put it, “trying to show everyone”). My purpose was to simply inform you of some of the aspects/things that you left out (or as you said, the things you did not have time for), and I did so in my usual blunt and honest fashion.

        If I offended you and/or if I strayed from the original purpose of your posting too much then I apologize.

        You are doing what more people around the world should be doing, & that is making sacrifices for someone other than yourself. That in itself is worthy of high praise/respect. Keep on writing and keep on being real, and worthwhile. Goodbye.

      2. Oh Daniel I do not mind you pointing out what YOU think the inadequacies of my article are, but I am not going to just agree w/ you because of your demeaning tone. Ample amounts of of people have voiced their differing opinions and I am pretty good natured about it. It was your superior attitude that annoyed me…
        Furthermore if someone loses their job due to downsizing , the economy etc that is not the same as them losing it because they go in w/ a negatively fostered idea that they can half-ass their way through life and get a pat on the back for it.
        What irritated me most about your comment (beside the fact that you were quoting my words back to me and going on forever) was that you are telling me what I missed or how I should have done it. Listen it is your GOD given right to do it better, so be my guest.
        You haven’t offended me and I do hope I haven’t offended you. I put myself out there by writing this blog and I did in my own name, unlike many, so obviously I can handle it. I actually enjoy hearing differing opinions and debating, again it was your tone that rubbed me wrong. Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment, I do appreciate it. Cheers!

  28. Very original blog post. This concept has been written and rewritten for the past 10 years or so. Oh wait, you used the word pussification so I guess that makes it cutting edge. Although I do agree with many of the observations I do think it needs to be pointed out that some changes are a result of education, research and in general… advancements. Specifically the comments about mental health. I see no problem with people seeking advice or consultation from therapists. Advancements have been made in this are in the past couple decades, stigmas have been reduced and insurance companies have acknowledged the need for mental health treatment. I don’t believe people are “pussies” for reaching out for help.The statement about education was off base in my opinion as well. My family is about to embark on our third (hopefully final) move in 6 years. Due to this I feel I can write knowledgeably on the topic of education as the schools our children will attend is the priority when house hunting. Technology is a must in schools for my family. No,my kids are not required to use cursive writing anymore, but they have been taught key boarding skills. In fifth grade Power Point presentations were the norm. The children were not taught this, rather expected to know it or to learn in time for due date. Yep, my high school daughter uses a calculator often on math tests. The teacher wants the procedure to be the focus, not the calculations. Does she know how to do the calculations, yes. When we look at public schools, the use of technology is one of our priorities. Schools should prepare students for their jobs that they may or may not love. (As I am writing, I am unable to think of 5 jobs that require pencil and paper….not even fast food workers).

    1. Very original comment. Oh wait I’ve hear it 5 times before, but not to worry I understand that there is not an original story, joke or comment left in the world. But, I wrote my blog in an original and entertaining way. At least quit a few people must think so…

      As for mental health I agree. My point was people in 3rd world countries have all the same problems we do, plus worse (child slavery, genocide!) and they do not have the luxury of medical care or access to prescriptions which may help.

      As for schools, I am very happy your kids are in good school, but if we were doing our job in this country we would not have fallen so far behind the rest of the industrialized nations; we are ranked 28th in math, 23rd in reading and 27th in science.

      Thanks for your comment.

  29. I agree with everything you have said and I wish more people thought and felt this way. I think you have done an excellent job in writing this and touching on a lot of problems now adays.I realize this is quite long but I wanted to express my opinions/experiences on a few things I myself have come across people who truly need a counselor or some type of medication for an actual problem but can’t afford medical insurance to get the much needed help (I am one of them with severe and potentially life threatening illnesses, with no insurance because i can’t afford it ) but I have also come across the people who take medication for the high rather than the health benefits and have medical insurance. I have also seen 2 children from 2 different families with the exact same problems(emotional problems-different types of emotional problems but they both still have these problems as well as speech problems, adhd, etc.) at the age of 8 & 9 . Family 1 (with the 8 yr old) worked with the child and the schools and the doctor, family 2 did not because they didn’t want their child “labeled”/ or on medication, and didn’t think that their child had a problem other than being a little hyper and slow at learning how to talk. Child 1 in less the 1 yr no longer had a speech problem, was on medication to help with the adhd (which helped in school and with concentration in all areas of their life), was always in the top fifth percentile on all the standardized state tests, always had really good grades. This child is now getting ready to graduate high school and go to a 4 year collage to be a lawyer, and has been working for the last 2 years at a fast paced job that deals with customer service, cleaning, cashing out customers etc. Child 2 (has been held back in school in the past) is also getting ready to graduate high school and possibly only be able to get in to a community college. Not saying that community colleges are bad just saying that child 2 doesn’t have the grades or the skills and capability to get accepted and succeed at a 4 yr college at this point. Child 2 still has a speech problem that is worse now that they are older and appears to be on a significantly lower level of education and mentality than child 1, partly because other people did the child’s homework for them instead of helping them learn to do it on their own. Child 2 also has been working for the past 2 yrs but the job differs greatly and requires little to no effort at all. I personally am a very fast learner and have a lot of skills that are being wasted because i cannot afford to go college, therefore I do not have the degrees or experience needed for the jobs that I am capable of doing with my physical condition being what it is. But I have seen people with the degrees and the “experience” (meaning accumulated time not actual capability) receive the jobs that I have applied for simply for those 2 reasons not because of ability, I absolutely do not agree with violence but i do believe in teaching children to be able to defend themselves (both verbally and physically) because lets face it, there are times that the child may not be able to avoid getting jumped or beat up, or hit, or get to an adult to diffuse the situation. My husband and I were raising our niece and nephew for 8 yrs and had a hell of a time doing so because of financial,behavioral and mental issues. We always tried to teach the children to avoid physical confrontations and to try to use their words to resolve issues or get and adult. After months of listening to the children cry because of bullies and no adult around to help i had to start telling them that it was ok to defend themselves and hit back but never first. I agree children should not get rewarded just for showing up for the things such as a sport, but also do agree that every child should at least get the chance to play if they are on a team so there are no favorites….you can’t get better without practice and hard work but you also need some incentive, initiative and praise to wanna try and to be part of a team. Sometimes praise and acknowledgement can be even better than an award, even as an adult we are like to hear that we are doing a good job but we don’t necessarily need an award. I was brought up with respect, structure, discipline, consequences and chores. You can bet your ass that even at my age I still show respect to my elders for fear of my father whooping my ass….yes i got the belt, no i was not abused and yes i usually deserved my punishment (except for when i took the blame for my sister so she didn’t beat me up lol). The fact that parents no longer do this infuriates me. Well I didn’t not like how strict my dad was growing up, or the chores, etc. I am truly grateful for those things because i know how to do things for myself and to act appropriately. I know many parents that I would like to slap upside the head for doing everything for their children, some of whom are now late teens and early 20’s or older and do not know how to cook or clean or properly take care of themselves on their own. A lot of parents need to stoop trying to be their kids friend and start remembering and showing the child that are the parent and accordingly. People really do need to stop thinking that everybody owes them something. Everyone should realize that everything you earn through hard work means more than anything that is just handed to you………Thank you for reading this.

  30. 2 words: AMEN SISTA. oh, but wait you forgot this one critical point: ENOUGH WITH THE DAMN HAND SANITIZER for all that it holy in this world can you please drop the hand sanitizer and take 3 large steps back. and whats with the matrix slo-mo moves to intercept your child from possibly moving in to take a sip out of the cup your friends kid is drinking out of. I swear!!!!!! Girl I can’t make sense of it. Thanks for your piece. Lolololol.

    1. Don’t get me started on the damn leashes people put on their kids when they go to the mall and whatnot . I’m actually very OCD and always clean my house, but I let my boy go out and get dirty. And, scientifically it’s been proven that if you kill all the germs, when they finally run into one they’re going to get sick and die! Okay that may be a wee bit exaggeration, but not that much.

      1. I read your post, I smiled, I laughed and I yelled “right on sista” out loud. I’m not sure I understand all of these responses? Am I living under a rock? What’s with all the harshness of some of these replies?. For heavens sake, the blog wasn’t meant to be a psychological/political/socioeconomic dissertation was it?? I thought of writing a blog but the responses are just so depressing. Lighten up folks.

      2. Hehe, right?!! I tried to be super duper nice at first, but after awhile I was like “Are you shitten me w/ this shit??” I even classified my blog under HUMOR, for crying out loud! I think some people just really want to be pissy, and I’m like, I just really wanna be drunky. BTW you have a beautiful name.

  31. This is the most honest post I have read in many years! Spot on! Love your candor allieheeney. This is exactly why we are no longer the most respected country in the world. We might as well take a nap every afternoon and say “F” it! Keep up your great work!! I don’t know about you but I ALWAYS THOUGHT THE Chinese WERE COMMUNISTS AND WE FOUGHT COMMUNISTS BADK IN MY DAY. Guess that’s all changed.

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